This is part three of my series documenting the demolition of the first floor of our house. Welcome back!!

Just in case someone out there can’t remember my last two posts verbatim, this is what the space looked like when we started:

Farrell was convinced that someone would love to have this old, piece-of-shit bar for their own, and sure enough, two weeks after we put an ad for the bar on the “free” section of Craigslist, some college kids contacted Farrell and came over to take it away:

After 10 hours of labor, one of the more savvy kids of the bunch said, “Hey, I bet you guys were really hoping that some college kids would be just dumb enough to respond to your ad and spend an entire day removing this bar…” Mmm. Exactly. Of course we pretended that it occured to us for the first time ever when he mentioned that.

Last weekend, two of my oldest and most treasured friends came to town to help us smash out some more walls. We started by removing a wall to the outside of the house where we plan to install a set of glass double doors. This involved using the cement saw (see my last post) and a lot of frenzied sledgehammering.

That is my excellent friend Seth. He and I have been friends since 1985. When we first met, we went to a religious rally in D.C. and pretended to be a devoutly Christian brother and sister (as we look so stunningly alike, this was easy to pull off) who had taken the bus there in order to praise God. (In truth, we both lived in D.C. at the time, and the fact that Seth was Jewish and I was raised without religion only added to the humor.) We asked people to help us by giving us money to get back home and then used the money to buy enough beer to not remember a good part casino spiele of the rest of the evening. We thought the whole thing was just hilarious. We were oh so punk rock. Hell yeah, 1985.

Anyway, this is the exterior of the wall we demolished, where the glass doors will eventually go. This weekend, though, it was all about getting the cinder blocks out:


I was vaguely involved in the smashing, but to be honest it was mostly Seth and Farrell who got this wall out. I couldn’t compete. God bless them.



The next project we took on was removing this yucky old addition that used to be a men’s bathroom. Farrell and I have been looking forward to getting rid of this crappy room since we first bought this house. Having Seth here with his brawn and motivation made it seem like the perfect time.

We started by removing the interior and getting the electric cables capped off. Then it devolved into a whole lot of smashing.



My other excellent friend, who will remain anonymous because of this unflattering photo of her butt, is probably (with the exception of my darling Farrell) my favorite person on the planet. She is just a delight. By the way, she has a hot ass — this is just a bad angle. But I digress. The reason I included that last photo is so you can see the hole that we just made, and how it relates to the little room that we removed.

Smashie McSmash.

Crushie McCrush.

We worked and worked until our two friends finally said, “Enough. Now go get us a beer.”

And so we did.

7 responses to “Smashed”

  1. Lane says:

    WOW! What a whole amazing world of sledghamers, broken concrete and internal mechanisms! I remain both intimidated and awed.

  2. G-Lock says:

    “And God said it was good.” (But I didn’t need to tell you good Christians that.)

  3. Stephanie says:

    I think her butt looks great in that photo.

  4. Jeremy Zitter says:

    Trixie, I can’t believe you got rid of the bar! I’m crushed. Aw, I had such a wonderful time sitting at that bar with you and Farrell during that last visit.

  5. Lisa Parrish says:

    Jeremy, I’m sure the college kids would be happy to have you over for a drink at the bar. Meanwhile, I can’t wait to check out Trixie & co’s. joint and have a hot drink in one of those mugs

  6. Yumm* says:

    R n’ F, having toured the burnt out mias that was your building in early December o4′, now following the cronicles of the first floor demolition, that hypertrophied yet neglected part of my brain that loves a georgous space is ….well, having estatic seizures. It kinda feels like y’all are single handedly wresteling the universe back into position…Go DC 80’s punk (Henry Rollins would be proud). Jem

  7. brooke says:

    love the photos. that masked, anonymous lady has a great ass. junk in the trunk, punk. but i have one word for you: dynamite. forget about the sledge hammers. keep the college kids, get yourself a quality video camera and some explosives, and you can rename this post from ‘smashed’ to ‘blasted!’. think of the possibilities.