This is the next SoCal party craze, following up on oxygen bars and botox parties. Come over, have a glass of wine, and get your heart rhythm checked.

Seriously, I had no idea they sold these on Ebay. In a strange way, it would be completely badass to have one around the house, like on a table in the living room next to a Lladro figurine.

Runner up (non-Ebay) item of the week: Neuticals. (H/t gswift.)

What’s great about this is that it’s (1) easy to sew (“Even absolute beginner sewers can make this belly band and matching bandana [sic] in LESS THAN ONE HOUR!”) and (2) matching — you can make a belly band AND a bandanna, basically a whole outfit, so nobody sees your dog and goes “Why does that dog have a belly band on? He must be one incontinent dog.” Instead, their eyes are drawn to the bandanna, and they figure it’s a whole outfit.

On the other hand, thinking about incontinent dogs who need diapers leads to sadness.

(Runner-up item of the week: RARE MUZAK LP – STIMULUS PROGRESSION NUMBER FOUR.)

So this year TGW was memorable for several things. First of all, of course, it was an election year–The Election Year–and so, it was wonderful to analyze, predict, vent, commiserate, wring hands, fret, toss and turn, and best of all, go through all of it with such a smart and interesting community of thinkers. There were many posts on this topic, of course, but one of the first that was memorable, for me at least, was Brooke Maury’s “A poignant and moving blog posting”, since it also foreshadowed the importance of activism and engagement in propelling our guy to victory.

I also marveled at Scott Godfree’s ability to combine caustic, biting criticism with spot-on ironic humor (not to mention those amazing visuals) in his post on the anniversary of the Iraq war.

It was also the year Bryan Waterman left us.

The year the economic crisis hit our TGW home.

The year that hate won, for now.

And Lisa Parrish:

It was another fine year for The Great Whatsit; hurrah for us! But it was also sad to see a few of our original writers go on hiatus, either officially or unofficially. I miss those voices of yore, though we’ve still managed to sally forth, day after day, with quality posts.

And now, in no particular order, more notable posts, nominated by a self-appointed committee contributors and readers to whom the editors are deeply grateful:

Best interview and best glimpse into the creative process: Bryan Waterman’s interview with Sam Amidon. “Fascinating look at how an artist re-imagines existing materials. I love Bryan’s questions, the curiosity of a fan.”

Best series of posts on a similar theme: Stella’s amusement posts over the summer. (For example.) “I love the nostalgia and Stella’s light and yet formal voice. I enjoyed how interactive they were. They generated so many great comments, memory and participation.”

Best post on a movie: “Danse Macabre” by Ruben Mancillas. “I thought to note Bob Fosse was important enough but to do it in such a thoughtful way, thank you!”

Best “I am sharing a great thing about me by talking about something else entirely”: Dave B, “The Finer Things.” “We can see right though you and we are so happy for you.” [Ed. note: Yikes.]

Delighfully weirdest: Pinky by Dorothy Gale.

Called out as both “Most disturbing” and “Most unnerving behavior”: When the Stories We Create Become True by Rogan Ferguson.

Best work-related post: Les enfants terrible by Stella.

Best guestwriter ghostwriter post: “”College Application”

Most fun Thursday Faves: “Google 2001” by Lisa Parrish.

Best reform post: “Voting right” by Stella.

Best generator of supportive and thoughtful comments: “Straddling offense” by Literacy H. Dogfight.

Best title: “You say two mottoes” by Ruben Mancillas (nominated independently by two people — its bestness is that good), with an honorable mention to “Why the Olympics totally blow” by Jeremy Zitter (which sentiment also received a “True, dat” from another nominator.)

Most interesting childhood watershed moment: “My first Republican National Convention” by Dave B.

Notable identity revelations: “Fugitive at the Fantasy faire” by Pandora Brewer and “This little Marxist goes bourgeois part 2” by S. Godfree.

Boldest suggestion: “The few, the proud, the suicidal” by Literacy H. Dogfight.

Best descriptions and best closing line: “Toughskins” by Bryan Waterman.

Best debates: “The great prostitution debate” by Literacy H. Dogfight and “Rock-n-roll nigger” by Bryan Waterman.

Best new words we learned from TGW: Latrinalia, chocabulary.

Best parenting post: “On nature, nests, and Bryan’s Brussels sprouts” by Pandora Brewer and
“Teach them well and let them lead the way” by Ruben Mancillas.

Biggest relief that you live in the 21st century: “1943 guide to hiring women” by Lisa Parrish.

Best thematic playlists: “But now I see” by S. Godfree and “The Breaks (Through, Down, Up, Out)”.

Most balls-out post (no, not Rogan’s steer castrating post): “Did the movies totally fuck us?” by Dorothy Gale, also containing the best parenthetical aside, “(maybe plead booze?).”

Best dilemma: “The dilemma” by Lisa Parrish.

Best going ahead and saying what we’re all thinking but are too afraid to voice: “The other shoe to drop” by Dorothy Gale.

Best series: Crack House Diaries by Rogan Ferguson.

Most heartbreaking: “A new season” by Stella.

Best travelogue: “Out of the frying pan” by Brooke Maury. (Rogan’s comment on this post was also called out as notable, though not as a travelogue.)

Best video: Trixie singing “You’re a Grand Old Flag.”

Best confession: “This little Marxist goes bourgeois” by S. Godfree.

Best glimpse into a life choice not one’s own: “Crack house diaries” by Rogan Ferguson.

Best “Hell yeah!” post and most irritating ensuing argument in the comments: “I thought I was done with this” by Dave B.

Most realistic recreated conversation: “Lazin’ on a sunny afternoon” by Stephanie Wells.

Most evocative: “The Welcome Home Band” by Lisa Parrish.

Most wrenching posts, coming in quick succession, revealing unfairness of the universe: “I wish I had a river” by Jen Mandel and “And…scene” by Literacy H. Dogfight.

Most emotionally fluent: “Refusing Collusion” by Stella.

Post after which we took a deep breath in relief it hadn’t ended differently: “Just the facts, ma’am” by Tim Wager.

Best food post: “Whenever you’re feeling good and hungry” by Pandora Brewer.

Most knowledgeable playlist: “Superheroes” by Adriana Velez.

Funniest observations about other human beings: “Stranger behavior II” by Stella.

Besides words, we have pictures. For best art: “With love on this special occasion” and “The writing’s on the wall” by S. Godfree.

Best use of graphs: “The good fight” by Brooke Maury.

A number of posts were mentioned for best or favorite photography. One reader mentioned Stella’s “Stella and the Sea Creatures” (also “best final photo”) and “Olive Festival” by Lisa Parrish. “I love the 3rd person narration in ‘Sea Creatures’ and love the character shots of people at the Olive Fest – the first was like a magical kid’s book and the second was like an Indy film where they just set up a camera to see what happens next.”

Also mentioned for photography were “Between Then and Now” by Pandora Brewer, “Virtual Tours with Rogan’s New Hobby” by Rogan Ferguson, and E. Tan’s Thursday Favorites post on “Polygamist Houses.”

Other posts nominated as “great” for unspecified reasons: “eDating adventures” by Slade; “I am breaking this one” by Jen Mandel; “Consumed with love” by Stella; “1994. Paris. 11th Arrondissement. Hotel de Belfort.” by Julie Grimm; “And so we begin” by Ginny.

Finally, the editors would like to thank the new voices that have joined us this year, both posting and in comments. And a huge thank-you to everyone who contributes to the site in large ways and small. Going through the archives to pick out notable posts, you’re confronted with an embarrassment of riches — the list above is far, far from comprehensive in listing the moments of pleasure and discovery that we had here in 2008. Here’s to another great year!

Oh, and I almost forgot: Lane’s nomination for “best comment”:

that poop tree one

Indeed.

8:00 am. Scott, Steph, Jeremy: Voting, woohoo! (Except, well, we can’t fuck this up again, can we? Yes, we can… Yes, we can…)

8:02 am. Scott: Got a little choked up while inking in my NO on 8 (couldn’t find the box for HELL NO!, so had to settle for (just) NO). I wonder if the human stomach can calcify from anxiety. How many hours till we hear anything?

12:35 pm. Steph: What, STILL no states showing anything but gray on the election maps? People, let’s start counting already! Sheesh!

12:36 to 4:31 pm. Jeremy: Fidgeting nervously, tempering expectations, checking various political blogs obsessively (btw, did any of you see this super-creepy image of Obama as a white guy and McCain as a black guy?), talking Steph down off of ledge after ledge…

4:32 pm. Steph: OK, here we go… Two states reporting, VT and KY. Shoutin’ out to my old love, Howard Dean, for delivering the first blue state. No surprises there, I guess, but it doesn’t feel good to see McCain in the lead, even if it’s only due to the Colonel. It’s still early.

5:00 pm. Steph: Are you kidding? New Hampshire went blue? This bodes well. Thanks, libertarians and Robert Frost descendents!

5:01 pm. Scott: Holy fuck! PA is blue, and announced so early! This looks like we’re in for a good night. Thanks, Trixie and Farrell.

6:30 pm. Steph: Oh no, Virginia is leaning red . . . c’mon, birthplace, alma mater, do me right, don’t let me down!

6:39, Jeremy: Ohio! Ohio! Ohio! I love you, Ohio! WOOOOOOOHOOOOOO OHIOOOOOO! (Wait, Fox News was the first to call Ohio? Uhhh… thanks Fox?)

6:47 pm. Scott:Hooray for Wisconsin! Great job, Pandora.

7:33 pm. Jeremy: What the F is up with that Will.I.Am hologram on CNN? I mean, seriously.

7:46 pm. Scott: The CA polls close in 14 minutes. I hope we can deliver our fair state to Obama.

8:01 pm. Scott, Steph, Jeremy: Wait, this just in… VT, NH, MA, CT, RI, NJ, DE, DC, ME, MD, NY, PA, VA, OH, MN, WI, IL, IA, IL, FL, CO, NM, NV, WA, OR, CA, HI: YIPPPPEEEEE!!! (Who needs California, anyway?)

8:03 pm. Champagne cork: Pop!

9:14 pm. Steph: VIRGINIA COMES THROUGH! Mister Jefferson would be proud! (He liked blacks, right?)

11:40 pm. Steph and Scott: Should we talk about Michelle’s dress? No, kinda sexist.

11:41 pm. Scott: It looks like proposition 8 is going to pass, but Jeremy pointed out that 70% of voters under 30 said no to prop. 8 (and yes to gay marriage), while 60% of those over 60 voted for discrimination and prejudice and hate. Scott takes heart in the fact that bigots tend to have worse diets, and are therefore more likely to suffer heart (as if) attacks and strokes.

11:43 pm. Jeremy: Andrew Sullivan responded to the Yes on 8 folks by saying, “Our marriages are real; all that is at issue is whether a majority will recognize them in law. The next generation already does.”

11:59 pm. Scott, Steph, Jeremy: So, is this interminable election really over? And did our guy really win? Really? Is anyone else skeptical, wondering if they’re gonna pull a dozen or so projections and turn it all over to the Supreme Court again? Did we really just witness history? Please tell us this all really happened…

The American Experience, “Walt Whitman” (PBS)
Last Thursday night we serendipitously stumbled upon the broadcast of The American Experience episode on Walt Whitman. One commentator noted that “it was as if Whitman had read a want ad’s notice for ‘National Poet’ and signed up.”

For me, the highlight was the discussion around Whitman’s first manuscript of “Leaves of Grass.” While showing the notebook, the commentator noted his first words, and then a crossing out, and then skipping down a half page and then, a rethought, and the first lines ready for publication:

“I CELEBRATE myself,
And what I assume you shall assume,
For every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you.”

It was a fine moment of television. In its combination of music, a sonorous voice, and that “Ken Burns” style of slo-mo (that makes old shit look really nice), you were given insight to that first flint strike that would become a campfire, and ultimately an inferno, that still holds us in awe.
–Lane Twitchell

Fun Home by Alison Bechdel (Houghton Mifflin)
This intimate exploration of the author’s relationship with her late, tight-lipped, semi-closeted, furniture-fussy, funeral-home directing, English-teacher father weaves in Proust, Gatsby, Wilde, and Radclyffe Hall, as Bechdel links her own OCD and eventual coming out to the traits she revered and resented in her distant yet dominant dad. A graphic novel (in both senses), it’s packed with exquisitely detailed Doonesburyish illustrations, plus insight both filial and sexual. The representations of ’70s Greenwich Village and ’80s college life shine plenty, but it’s Bechdel’s fearless spelunking into memory, family, sex, death, childhood, and love — y’know, those minor themes — that catapult it to literary-memoir swoonworthiness.
–Stephanie Wells

21 (Sony Pictures)
A group of MIT genius students counts cards and makes millions in the casinos. Vegas! Card games! Evil Kevin Spacey! Guitar-pop-driven montages! Laurence Fishburn as antihero! What’s not to like? Well, everything else, actually. The screenplay suffers from leaps of illogic, the leading man slips in and out of his accent (he’s a Brit playing an American) and the main characters are archetyped to within an inch of their celluloid lives. Still, if you’re in the mood, it’s decent popcorn fare. See it in an empty theater with someone you can giggle through it with.
–Lisa Parrish

Settling
Lori Gottlieb writes: “Settle! Don’t worry about passion or intense connection. Don’t nix a guy based on his annoying habit of yelling ‘Bravo!’ in movie theaters… Because if you want to have the infrastructure in place to have a family, settling is the way to go.” Bullshit. (Here’s Tobey Maguire buying the rights.) Yelling Bravo! in a movie theater is a far cry from yelling Bravo! in bed. And more infuriating, the single-mom author cannot even commit to her own thesis — “It’s one thing to settle for a subpar mate; it’s quite another to settle for a subpar father figure for my child.” Love rules.
–Wendy West