Dear Cedric

Dear Cedric,
When my boyfriend orgasms, he shoots his load much further than mine. What can I do to improve my distance?
Lance B.

Dear Lance,

We all love pushing our bodies to their limits. Who hasn’t participated in a watermelon seed spitting contest? A rock-skipping challenge? Or a hotdog eat-off? Growing up, all boy scouts at summer camp have contests to see who can pee the farthest. So why shouldn’t people have an ejaculate-a-thon? They do. (And you can certainly find their movies on YouTube.)

There actually are many tricks to a record-winning distance. The first is abstinence. It’s true that the longer a male goes without ejaculating, the more ejaculate builds up, and the further it will shoot. But wait too long, and disaster lurks in the form of the dreaded nocturnal emission, or “wet dream.” If too much semen builds up, the body has a natural overflow valve that will force ejaculation during sleep. Therefore, a good “ejacu-lete” must perfectly gauge the abstinence interval without overdoing it.

Another trick to a long-distance ejaculation is pressure. What happens when you hold your thumb over the tip of a flowing garden hose? The pressure and smaller opening created by the thumb causes the water to shoot further. A bit of thoughtfully placed pressure near the distal part of the penile shaft (on the underneath side) can sometimes help propel a load further than expected.

There are other tips, but doctors are somewhat split over their effectiveness. Some people champion Kegel type exercises to strengthen the pubococcygeus or “sex muscles” but it’s unclear how involved they are in propelling semen. Other people recommend dietary supplements such as zinc and lecithin (which are common components of semen). Consuming large amounts of liquids probably increases the volume. Diet may have an effect, specifically, the consumption of oysters. Dietary no-no’s may include soy products because they contain estrogen-type substances that might counterbalance testosterone. Some companies even sell medicines (like Semenax) that reportedly augment the volume and strength of orgasm. But it’s not FDA approved, and I certainly can’t vouch for it.

But just like most sports, genetics often help determine the best athlete. Large stature may boost a basketball career, or, conversely, short stature may qualify you for dwarf tossing. With ejaculation, many different anatomic variants will make some people into natural shooters and other people into dribblers. And at this point, modern medicine hasn’t developed any techniques to fully assess or surgically change those circumstances.

I feel compelled to add that ejaculation distance has no known correlation with fertility, masculinity, health, or happiness. There is no reason a person has to have a high-volume, long-distance ejaculation. Likewise, there is no reason a person has to have huge biceps, blonde hair, or curvy hips. But some people seek out those things.

So, Lance, if it’s important to you, for whatever reason, to be a champion ejaculator, then I wish you the best of luck. Happy training.

4 responses to “Dear Cedric”

  1. JaneAnne says:

    I think age has an inverse correlation with ejaculatory distance, as well (certainly it does in my experience, though granted I haven’t gone back to the longest shooter to see if the intervening years have resulted in any decline).

    I also remember reading somewhere that one trick to increasing semen volume is to get highly aroused without climaxing. I guess the seminal fluids accumulate during arousal, then if not expulsed can linger a while before being reabsorbed by the body. Makes me wonder if maintaining arousal for Sting-like periods would also increase volume?

  2. […] Cedric Cedarbrook, MD, “Dear Cedric: ejaculatory distance” Scott Godfrey, “The church of man-love” Lisa Parrish, “My gay secret” (Parts 1 and 2) Jeremy Zitter, “Amusement-phobic” […]

  3. GeGo says:

    Kegel excercises *do* work for distance. When I was in my teens and 20s, I would always ejaculate a ways. Once I got into my 30s, it slowly turned into a dribble. Just one of those small things that makes you feel old.
    I started doing Kegel excercises every day, and within a few weeks, the semen started shooting out again like when I was younger. I stopped the Kegels, and I went back to a pathetic dribble. I started Kegels again, and am now shooting well again!

    Needless to say, Kegels are now a daily part of my life. You can do them while just sitting down, at any time. Good stuff.

  4. RE: #3 — A fitting comment for wedding week!

    I had lunch in an old, distinguished club up town today with an old friend who’s a distinguished librarian at an Ivy school. He had clipped the wedding announcement from the Times and asked me if I had seen it. (He was keen on the mention of BYU in a gay wedding listing.) He was surprised when I told him I was at the wedding! Go Cedric!