Standing in line is a problem. One would never choose to queue.
We’re there because our demands outstrip some sort of supply, whether of cashiers, buses, or bartenders. Or we are supplicants for food or money. Our time is not valued and is in the control of others. We have to stay in proximity to people we may not choose to spend time with. We cannot respond to our own needs for refreshment, temperature control, or entertainment.
Queuing culture varies dramatically. Of course the British are famous for orderly and accurate queues.
The Soviets must have had patience. I heard today that the Germans are aggressive. The Americans are impatient. And the French overly patient.
When I lived in rural France, I was stunned to find that in the bakery, the post office or the hardware store, the customer and the shopkeeper would happily embark on winding conversations regardless of how many people stood waiting behind them. It’s a wonderful quality of life philosophy for those in the conversation. And devastating for those waiting.
Airports are the worst because air travel involves a series of queues for check-in, security, boarding, restrooms, disembarking, baggage claim and cabs.
No wonder we pay extra not to stand in line…to be in business class or silver super premium club. I’m a fan of situations where rich people have to queue in spite of lives where they have all but eliminated this activity. Like the coat line after an inaugural ball.
What’s wrong with us? Is it so terrible to stop and slow down and wait our turn? To share resources with our community? Growing up I remember queuing with Mum at the butcher’s, the grocer’s, and the baker’s. In store after store we expected to expend time and money before receiving goods. Now the hallmark of a yuppie-topia grocery store is the brevity of the queue. And you know you’re in the ghetto Giant at 9th and P when you can count on 20 minutes before getting your goods out of the cart.
Queuing should be easier now. We have cellphones and I-pods and Blackberries. We no longer have to stand in philosophical contemplation of our place in the universe. And yet we hate it more than ever.
Will the new depression encourage us to stand in line?
I love thinking about lines and the socio-psychological goings-on represented.
I was in line for something the other day (one of many many lines) and I was sharing with my companion that I might step away to find a restroom. The woman in front of me turned around and growled, “well I am not saving your place, you will lose your place!” Ouch. Then I think of what I do when someone cuts in front of me in line. I was punched in the nose in high school for telling a girl to go the back of the line – and in spite of this reminder I get all righteously indignant when someone tries to edge in. I think of the woman who growled and realize she is a reflection of my own line vigilant behavior. Thanks to your post I am resolved to be more British in my approach. I shall bring a book and be civil.
Fun post, Stella!
“Will the new depression encourage us to stand in line?”
What a brilliant question!
I have an overly heightened sense of justice, so or me, the worst thing about waiting in lines is when others don’t abide by the rules and bully their way in ahead of their turn. I hate both the injustice of it and the disorder it creates for us rule followers.
The way the major highways in England use speed fluctuations to control traffic flow would probably never work in the US. It’s recently been attempted in my city to help deal with bottle necking at rush hour while they are doing major hwy construction. No one abides by the slow downs, because every selfish person out there thinks THEY need to be home more than anyone else on the road. Are Americans more self-absorbed than others? I think so. I see this as proof of the general superiority of politeness as a cultural value in England. (FWIW)
Sounds silly, but unless I really have some place to be, I like standing in line — I’ll take an excuse to do nothing any day.
I find it fascinating that the Chinese don’t stand in lines. They crowd in, shove, and push. Lines are not part of their society.
Has anyone else encountered a culture that doesn’t stand in lines?
I also don’t mind standing in line if I really want what I’m waiting for or if there’s no time pressure. I tend to watch other people or just zone out and daydream. I do hate waiting for elevators, though.
Also line-related: New Yorkers say “on line” rather than “in line,” which still sounds odd to me although I’ve been slowly adopting it in spite of myself.
Another great post for a Friday. Thanks for putting in the time to write this!
The Soviets were indeed the world experts at standing in line. Whenever people would see a line, they’d go stand in it first, then ask what the line was for. Because if there was a line for it, it had to be something good, right?
And even if it wasn’t anything you needed at the end of that line, it could at least be used for barter. People would line up to buy shoes, then buy a pair even if they were three sizes too large, to trade them for something else later.
Classic Soviet joke:
A Soviet man is waiting in line to purchase vodka from a liquor store. Due to restrictions imposed by Gorbachev, however, the line is excessively long. The man loses his nerve and screams “I can’t take this waiting in line anymore! I HATE Gorbachev! I am going to the Kremlin right now to kill him!”
After 40 minutes the man returns, and begins elbowing his way back to his place in the vodka queue. As the crowd watches on, they begin to ask if he succeeded in killing Gorbachev. The man replies,
“No, I got to the Kremlin, but the line there was worse than this one.”
Queues are like the kinds of office meetings you are expected to attend, but where no-one is actually interested in your opinion: Legitimised time-wasting. Mmmm. I learned to sleep with my eyes open.
8: hahahhahaahhaahahhahahahaaaaa. good one, lp!
we miss you and rb!
In Los Angeles, the on-ramps and off-ramps to the freeways are often queued up. It is frustrating to wait five minutes to get onto the freeway only to watch as someone in the next lane zips to the front and cuts in. On the other hand, it is easy to miss that the line of cars backing a mile long is in fact a queue for the on-ramp, so everyone cuts from time to time. Motorcycles almost never have to queue.
If I see someone cut in line I will typically ask them about it in a loud but calm voice, so they are made accountable. Maybe they have a sense of shame. Maybe they are with someone else in the line. Maybe they had to use the restroom, and someone was holding their place. If that isn’t the case I will follow up, loud enough for folks to hear, but not shouting, “Do you think that is fair to all of the other (I want to say ‘boys and girls’) people in the line behind you?” Worse than the queue cutter is the person who thinks it is their right to let any person cut in front of them.
I was once at the Disney Concert Hall to see a performance when an elderly woman cut in front of me in the queue. It was all assigned seating, so this was totally unnecessary. Also, she was a CUTE old lady, the kind you might see in a Clapper commercial. In her old age (or maybe she was always a queue cutter) she had become accustomed to just doing whatever the hell she wanted. I’d heard that old people sometimes feel invisible, and that this is very sad for some of them, so I took it upon myself to treat this queue cutting granny exactly as I would treat any other queue cutter. “Excuse me mam, but the end of the line is back there.” She looked up at me sweetly through her quarter inch thick glasses and smiled. “Do you think it is fair to cut in front of all of these people?” More silence and sweet smiling. She was good. I’ll have to remember that.
Wow, Rogan, you are ruthless! :)
12: Agreed.
Rogan, you write that “It was all assigned seating, so this was totally unnecessary.” Unnecessary, except for the fact that she’s standing on 80-year-old little arthritic twig legs, so probably could do with sitting down earlier than the younger folks.
Sometimes being “right” is not the highest good.
I know that this is an old conversation by now, but I just wanted to throw a question out there: how do you all feel about table saving? You know, “Honey, you get a table while I place our order.” To me this is line-cutting. Thoughts?
I don’t know. You really never know who’s hungrier than you, who’s not feeling well, who’s got an emergency, who needs to sit down. I generally don’t get bothered with people cutting in front of me — who knows what they are going through.
14: My blood boils when I see this.
You mean at a place where you order at the counter, but they have seats for dining? I think it’s totally standard for one person or more to go hold down a table while someone else orders. Should your whole party just stand around until you get your food?
I don’t go to many places like this that are crowded, though.
What about saving a few seats in a movie theater? Is that equally offensive?
17: my big problem with this is that it creates a disadvantage for those who dine alone — are we to stand and eat or get our food to go because someone else is sitting, foodless at the last remaining table? I have sat and started eating across from strangers in these scenarios.
However, I agree that it’s become standard practice.
14: He hates it even more if they then do “the wave.”
18: I think this is different, though I’m not a fan of people reserving movie seats for those who they think might be coming, then releasing those seats at the last moment when the people don’t show.
If you’re sitting and your friend is getting your food, and someone else who’s gotten there is standing, looking bereft because there are no seats, you have sinned.
Sorry, should be “…and someone else who’s gotten their food before you…”
Why dine alone? Isn’t it sad? Even lunch alone…I once was starving and got a soup at Quiznos and sat at that table there and felt so sad for myself. There I was with that tiny cup of soup, staring at the people outside. I don’t like crowds unless I’m with friends; by myself I feel totally uncomfortable. Scotty, you really do this, just sit next to strangers, just like that? What do you say to them? What’s the fun of dining out then?
22: I guess not everyone is as popular as you. Besides, I like being alone in public places, especially restaurants, movie theaters, and museums. I find that one can enjoy public spaces better without the emotional clutter that can be caused by another person. Maybe your sorrowful lunching experience came from the fact that you were eating at a Quiznos — now that is depressing!
And yes, I sit with strangers.
“I Sit with Strangers” – a debut novel by Scotty McGodfrey that explores the the dark side of dining.
Out in paperback this fall.
Meet the author at our special New Yorker event this August at Chautauqua and learn firsthand his vision for the sequel “Sorrowful Lunching.”
23
:) I am sorry Mr. Fancy-restaurant-eat-aloner-to-get-away-from-the-pesky-“emotional clutter” to depress you with the mentioning of such a paltry name as Quiznos. I was just asking a subservient and rather self-effacing question and being acerbic (towards myself, of cou-se). I suppose some people eat alone and some don’t –nothing wrong with either. I agree with you on museums though, it is fun to browse them alone or… with strangers…
That’s cool.