From the website Sexy People comes a photo retrospective of two brothers, Wayne and Jeffery, who posed for an extraordinary series of photos as young boys in the late ’60s and early ’70s.
1968:
1970:
1971:
I love this series, as it captures everything that’s so wrong, and therefore so right, about child portrait photography. These children appear traumatized by the camera, all dressed up in their Sunday-best turtlenecks and jackets and staring unblinkingly ahead — or, in the 1971 photo, at whoever’s standing just above and to the left of the camera.
They do seem to calm down a bit by 1973 or so…
… and by 1976 they’re downright confident in front of the lens:
In addition to those of Wayne and Jeffery, there are legions of other fantastically awful portraits on this site. Some were sent in by people who stumbled across them on the web, but many were sent by the photographic subjects themselves. Those are my favorites, as I feel better laughing at people when they’ve invited me to. People such as:
Tom:
Tara:
And, oh my lord, Christine:
Anyway, taking good portraits is hard — especially if it’s a whole family portrait. Trust me – I know.
Mom (1968) and Christine (baby mullet) are kind of scary, but your feathered bangs are fabulous. I so badly wanted that look, but was not allowed to cut bangs. Did you and your mom wear matching necklaces on purpose? These photos are priceless.
Wayne & Jeffery’s mom has got totally cool hair.
Pray tell, what exactly in Wayne’s 1973 photo suggests “calmed down” to you???
Yes, but my question is: does anyone know how she got her hair to stand up like that? It looks like it’s propped up by cardboard.
Plus, I love Tara’s hair. It looks like a lion’s mane and is even the right color.
This is the perfect follow-up to yesterday’s post. God, poor Wayne and Jeffrey. Weird-ass-looking kids.
OTOH, you, Ms. Parrish, are really pretty in those pictures.
Related: AWB linked to this in comments elsewhere.
I am crying at my desk over these. I love how your mom is always looking the other direction. When our family got Olan-Mills portraits taken I was always the one looking in the other direction. I blamed it on the photographer providing confusing cues. But your mom seems to do it outside the chaos of the photography studio, and to do it insistently, even gleefully.
1 – Yes, we had matching necklaces. I wore that cross for years – it was a gift from my mom, I believe.
3 – It’s all relative.
6 – When we got the photos developed, I asked my mom why she was always looking away. “So there won’t be glare on my glasses,” she said. “But you could still have moved your eyes, to at least look at the camera!” I said, full of superior 12-year-old wisdom. In retrospect, however, the photos are way more charming this way than if she’d been looking sideways at the camera .
Tara is pretty smoking hot, and I agree with Kate that her hair is awesome. LP, you are pretty smoking hot yourself, and your gorgeous locks make me want to comb them.
Whoa, Nellie. The girl in those photos is TWELVE. Tara you can have, but back away from the gorgeous locks, please.
Kate, she is totally wearing “bump-its”
Tara’s got that 80’s hair-do. Whoever came up with that style owes us, well, those of us, who blindly followed fashion and looked umm… ridiculous… In the 90’s, it continued, but the banks were supposed to be curled with a curling iron. God, the time it took to do that.
I love how your mom looking out the the frame lends this visonary quality to her.
“Leading the family to the bright horizon” sort of thing.
Like she sees the Rapture coming on. What with the necklaces and all.
“it was a gift from my mom, I believe.”
Shouldn’t this read: “It was a gift from my mom. I believed.”
Poor Christine. Is that glint in her eye because she just ate her parents?
What’s with Wayne and Jeffrey’s dad??
Thanks, LP, that was some much needed cheer in an otherwise bleak Wednesday morning…
i think the jersey dresses that you and your mom are wearing are kind of awesome.
also, your brother’s expression in the first photo of your family reminds me of dirk diggler.
dirk diggler is becoming a standard point of reference! funny.
I would have guessed mom’s dress was made of terry cloth, which makes me wonder, what ever happened to clothing made of terry cloth? I had lots in the 70s. Just when you think every bad thing has made a reappearance in fashion…
11-14: HAAAAA!
15: Sorry your morning was bleak; just look at Wayne’s eyes and he can lull you into a hypnotic calm.
16: Jersey dresses, yes. If I had to wear a dress, I wanted one that was basically a giant t-shirt.
Christine’s photo lives on!!! in this video. (Fast-forward to 2:20 if you don’t want to have a seizure, and good luck with those nightmares.)