Alien fresh jerky

About a three-hour drive northeast of LA, on the road to Las Vegas, you’ll come across the World’s Largest Thermometer.


It’s mighty impressive, but it’s not my favorite roadside attraction in the town of Baker, California. That honor goes to a little jerky store down the street. Not just any kind of jerky: Alien Fresh Jerky*.


Alien Fresh Jerky sells a whole range of jerky products, but first you have to get past the guards in front:



Don’t believe in aliens? The proprietors have helpfully posted evidence of their existence right in front for all to see.



Inside the store, you can buy anything from jerky to hot sauce to action figures to t-shirts to hats. Turns out, aliens have some pretty able commercial representation here on Earth.




Not in the mood to buy? You can always just get your fortune told by an alien in a turban. Lucky numbers printed on the reverse!


*No aliens were harmed in the making of this jerky.

20 responses to “Alien fresh jerky”

  1. That “alien crossing” t-shirt is great. For some reason I’m thinking it would be much better, though, without the “Baker, Ca” caption — sort of makes it too specifically a souvenir.

    If you’re ever out this way you can get great fresh jerky from the Jamaican patties store on Flatbush next to Grand Army Plaza, assuming it is still there.

  2. Dave says:

    I like the fierce disco queen alien in the last photo.

    What’s the connection between Baker and aliens?

  3. trixie says:

    hey what is this, the lisa parrish blog?

  4. LP says:

    Tomorrow: Lisa Parrish writes on her life and times
    Thursday: Lisa Parrish on facing down the criticism: What is wrong with self-absorption?
    Friday: Lisa Parrish photo essay.

  5. If Google is any guide, the principal connection between Baker and aliens is the existence of this fresh jerky stand.

  6. LP says:

    2: The history of Alien Freshy Jerky can be found here. The first store was apparently at the head of the “Extreterrestrial Highway” leading into Area 51. There are some excellent historical photos.

    Also, the history of little Baker, CA as described on the town website is quite colorful. Click through to “the rest of the story” for such historical gems as:

    “In 1944 Curtis Howe Springer, known as ‘Doc’ Springer arrived at Soda Springs with
    his wife and young family. He promptly renamed Soda Springs ‘Zzyzx’ wanting it to be
    the last word in the English Dictionary. In time ‘Doc’ Springer would construct a number
    of beautiful buildings and a lake on the site. He was an advocate of healthy living and
    healthy foods and was known World wide for his religious broadcasts. ‘Doc’ Springer
    bought ingredients, mixed and packaged them and shipped the out. His mail volume
    caused the class of the Post Office in Baker to be up-graded.”

  7. Tim says:

    Tomorrow: Lisa Parrish writes on her life and times
    Thursday: Lisa Parrish on facing down the criticism: What is wrong with self-absorption?
    Friday: Lisa Parrish photo essay.

    Yay!!! The public demands even more Lisa Parrish!

  8. Jane says:

    I have driven by the big “Alien Fresh Jerky” sign multple times. I can’t wait to actually stop next time.

  9. Jeremy says:

    You’d think aliens would have a cooler car than that… You know, something a little more advanced or something.

  10. trixie says:

    9: i like how they pried the ford insignia off the front of the car.
    i agree, it deflates the whole thing a bit to think about the aliens schlepping around in a ford taurus.

    4: yay! what about next week?

  11. LP says:

    Monday: Lisa Parrish spotted at West Hollywood grocery store, sampling items in wholesale bins
    Tuesday: Lisa Parrish arrested in wee hours for screaming “I’m Lindsay Lohan!” in a crowded theater
    Wednesday: Lisa Parrish: My life in rehab
    Thursday: Lisa Parrish: The comeback
    Friday: Lisa Parrish: The guest appearance on The Love Boat

  12. Ivy says:

    It’s a global phenomenon. Prowling around Auckland NZ on Monday night, as one does, I drove past Parrish Street. Oddly close to the home (when she’s at home) of our lamented ex-PM. Are these things connected? Who knows. But Parrish is everywhere…

  13. N. says:

    Hey Trixie, I’m very impressed with your car knowledge! To think of it, this model should have been out of its patrol job long time ago due to transmission troubles, of course. So, it is pretty futuristic for an old Ford Taurus (91-92 body?) to patrol the area. Those aliens probably dressed the car with some serious 5.7 L and a secret Enzo body, not detectable to the human eye. It needs some cool hub caps though.

    Why do all aliens look alike? Aren’t there girls and boys? And if there are, how come there are no cute ones?

    LP, keep posting! Love ya lots!

  14. 13. “Why do all aliens look alike? Aren’t there girls and boys? And if there are, how come there are no cute ones?”

    OMG! Like, that is SO specist!

    Hey LP, whenever I’m driving in this region, I try to manage my fillups so that I DON’T have to stop in Baker. As you prove here, that has been my great loss. I will be pikcing myself up some Alien Jerky on my next trip to Utah.

  15. I just figured out why I’ve been lingering on the title of this post any time I look at TGW — there was a jerky stand on Allen St. on the LES a while back called either “Allen Jerky” or “Allen Fresh Jerky”.

  16. LP says:

    14: Why would one ever avoid the world’s largest thermometer? And Alien Fresh Jerky? I’m so glad you have seen the light: Baker is the only thing on that long, desolate stretch of highway that’s worth seeing. There are a few other odd little places in Baker, too. It’s like a twilight zone town.

  17. Natasha says:

    #14. Gosh, Rogan, apparently, I was so far behind on that political correctness thing that I did not realize that making fun of a human created imagery of an alien is actually racist towards other species. Since you have a better cognizance of the matter, perhaps, you can better explain the image of a psychic alien in a turban, and, OMG, I SO promise to not be derisive.

  18. Rogan says:

    17. OMG! They’re fake?

  19. 18. If I had ten cents for every time I heard that

  20. Brennan says:

    I almost killed myself trying to pull off the highway to get to this place. I have no regrets.
    I saw the first sign right outside of Vegas. The second sign halfway there, followed by a sign that said something to the effect of “exit RIGHT NOW!!!”
    Baker, California is a pretty fascinating town in and of itself. Never mind that there’s an enormous thermometer and a little shop that sells alleged alien meat. I tried some. It was out of this world! Get it? Uggghhh…