Comments on: I Wish I Had A River

By: Mimi

Mimi — Fri, 19 Dec 2008 04:23:10 +0000

Take pride in the successes of others.

What I mean, is that, you will do things differently than your children or brothers. Everyone makes their own choices. Remember your mother for all the good. And know that if she was 100% lucid, she would undoubtedly be so, so embarrassed.

Any woman with 3 kids and straights A’s in school can take care of herself. And thats what she probably thught she’d always do …

hugs and kisses to you and YOUR strength.

By: PB

PB — Fri, 19 Dec 2008 00:46:12 +0000

This is beautiful writing.
I have been bitchy and anxious all week. How stupid of me not to bask in every moment of health and coherence.
All we have is now.

By: ginny

ginny — Thu, 18 Dec 2008 16:15:02 +0000

I have lived through the same experience. It is nearly unbearable. But I bore it, because I had to. And I am a different person because of it. Best wishes to you.

By: j-man

j-man — Thu, 18 Dec 2008 04:16:12 +0000

Thanks for all of your kind thoughts. To be fair, I am learning to live with this situation, and am able, a lot more of the time, to compartmentalize my feelings about my mom’s situation and keep them somewhat separate from the rest of my life.
Lane, I’m so sorry to hear about your sister – that’s really rough.

By: Marleyfan

Marleyfan — Wed, 17 Dec 2008 23:03:37 +0000

Jen,
What a caring and loving daughter you are. It is obvious from the amount of nursing homes that not many people are able to take care of our parents like you have been able to. I hope that when and if my parents get to this point, that I can follow in your footsteps. It is clear that you need to take care of yourself (most caretakers neglect themselves).

I’ve been re-reading the Seven Habits of Highly Sucessful people, and the first chapter which deals with being proactive talks about Victor Frankl’s incarceration in the death camps. I really needed to read it, because it spoke about how when we cannot change a situation, sometimese the only thing we can change is our outlook. Frankl said
“The last of the human freedoms: to choose one’s attitude in a given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way”.

Keep your nose to the wind, and adjust your sails as needed, and as my grandmother advised me “always find someting to look forward to”.
Our thoughts are with you.