Dear diary

Dear Diary:

Got back from a destination wedding where two people with a great deal more clarity than I have vowed to spend the rest of their lives together. I am so happy for them, but can’t help wonder if I’ll ever be ready to do that. Having just ended a 9.5-year relationship with someone great, I feel at the other end of the stability and emotional harmony spectrum. Sigh.

Turned 40! What a relief. Had total emotional meltdown a week earlier and nearly cancelled party. Experienced intense mid-life crisis—expected to be settled and happy in every aspect of life by 40th birthday, but plan fell apart. Am I just a slow starter or an emotional disaster? Hard to say at this point. Good news: birthday horoscope says year ahead is one of liberation.

Very tired after delightful birthday. Spent time reviewing gifts—didn’t really deserve so much booty, but it takes edge off mid-life crisis. Can’t wait to sip champagne while trying on new make-up after eating salad from gorgeous Vietnamese bowl with new iPod stereo playing in background. Caught up on Entourage—surely Medillin will be a huge hit?

Got email from immigration lawyer: It gives me great pleasure to advise you that your permanent residence application has been approved. The copy of USCIS email herewith attached indicates your permanent residence card has been ordered and will be mailed directly to your home address upon completion. You will also receive a “welcome notice” from the USCIS.

Picked self up off floor. After four years of stress, expense, and stress, my quest for permanent legal residence has ended successfully. Immediate reaction was crying, followed by phone calls to ex, who is almost entirely responsible for getting me here and through this process, and other friends. Experienced almost an hour of euphoria before job stress stamped out joy. But now … can leave job. Life just changed.

Posted blog.

It’s been a busy week.

14 responses to “Dear diary”

  1. Literacy H. Dogfight says:

    My favorite line:

    didn’t really deserve so much booty, but it takes edge off mid-life crisis

    I hope you meant booty in all its senses; that would have been my birthday wish for you. Happy birthday! And congrats on the residency status!

  2. LP says:

    Stella, I raise a glass to you, to your green card, and to us (as friends, exes, successful green card getters, whatever incarnation works). I’m so happy to have been here this week for your birthday and the big news.

  3. Lane says:


    It was great seeing you in Tahoe.

  4. brooke says:

    Congratulations on everything, Stella! What a week! Here’s to you, champ.

  5. trixie says:

    that is awesome news stella! congratulations on your citizenship. we are lucky to count you among us.

  6. trixie says:

    or permanent residency. not sure about the differences exactly.

  7. Wayne says:

    Congratulations Stella! May this truly be a year of liberation!

  8. MF says:

    Congratulations! It was great seeing you in Montreal. Happy Happy Birthday. And Happy Permanent Residency!

  9. Dave says:

    Yay Stella!

  10. Tim Wager says:

    Mazel tov and mazel tov again! Great news.

    And not to worry, 40 is the new black.

  11. lisa t. says:

    stella, you U.S. permanent resident, you. single and 40 is equally as hot as married-in-Montreal. I selfishly get to horde time with your ex now in L.A., so…thanks? Hope we cross paths sometime on the emotional harmony spectrum; happy birthday.

  12. J-Man says:

    Stella, this is excellent news on all counts! Congrats and happy b-day.

  13. Adriana says:

    Well happy fourth of july and a yankee doodle doo to you!

  14. G-Lock says:

    Sorry to have missed the birthday festivities, my dear, but we’re thinking of you and are celebrating your excellent milestone(s) this week!

    Remember what I told you about that (straight) guy who left the wedding reception and, within earshot of his girlfriend, commented on your rockin’ self…..