Notable moments in divine persuasion

LONDON, March 3 — Prime Minister Tony Blair has indicated that God influenced his deliberations when he committed British troops to fight alongside American forces in Iraq.
Alan Cowell, The New York Times, March 4, 2006

April 20, 1491: St. James the Greater convinces Columbus to sail west rather than south.

December 3, 1571 B.C.: After intensive behind-the-scenes lobbying, the Ten Commandments emerge from committee. The final text is nearly identical to the Yahweh-backed proposal, despite heavy pressure from Ba’al and a coalition of lesser Egyptian deities in favor of a child-sacrifice loophole for small-business owners.

August 14, A.D. 400: Woden suggests that Wirtomir the Beastly go with the taupe; Fulla suggests the ecru. A disastrous row ensues.

March 30, 216 B.C.: Consul Publius Cornelius Scipio ignores a dream sent by Mars, god of war, that involved elephants marching over mountains. Writing the dream off to “that wicked hash that Ionius Flavius scored in Mylae,” the consul is dismayed the next day by reports of Hannibal coming down from the Alps for battle.

October 14, 1940: Woden suggests that Prime Minister Winston Churchill go with a gimlet; Fulla suggests a G&T. Churchill manages to satisfy both deities and follows up by taking drink suggestions from Rama, Guan-Yu, and the Congolese creator-god Bumba. The Prime Minister finishes his drinks in time for dinner with the American ambassador.

August 28, 2005: Saying he’s too busy clearing brush to come to the phone, President George W. Bush declines a phone call from Jesus. According to an anonymous White House official, Bush is overheard saying, “What the (expletive) is he doing calling from New Orleans, anyway?”

God speaks to Blair

One response to “Notable moments in divine persuasion”

  1. Shar says:

    It really hurts that a British Prime Minister is invoking God, when we (Brits) pride ourselves on secularism (the Church of England) and spend many a happy hour laughing at American religious cults (the Administration.)